Steps To Build Self Esteem

By Antje Govers


What do you think of yourself as a person? How do you think other people see you? The first question is considerably more important than the second; however the second may provide an invaluable insight into the first.Your self esteem is how you see yourself, what you think of yourself and what value you assign to yourself as a human being. Self esteem is a part of your character and personality. It is a trait unique to you which encompasses your inner-most feelings of confidence, integrity, love, respect, pride and happiness.

You will easily be able to identify a person with high self esteem. Their very existence will exude all the characteristics above, from their physical appearance right down to the manner in which they speak. They tend to be popular, motivated, ambitious and do not accept defeat easily. Their purpose in life has meaning and they vigorously pursue what they want until they achieve it.In contract, people with low self esteem think they are worthless. They believe that nothing they do merits recognition, praise, respect or reward. Such a person will contently devalue themselves in the presence of others because they simply do not believe they are worthy. They tend to shy away from social inclusion and take the view that everybody else's opinions matter more than their own. They feel shameful and embarrassed at the very thought that they could ever be admirable in any way.

The major downside of low self esteem is the fact that it holds us back. A sound self esteem is very important for it allows us to succeed in life. It makes our life better and gives us the power to enjoy life more. Building self esteem and confidence is therefore considered as one of the challenges of life that we need to cope with. This way we will reap the rewards of having a productive and fulfilling life in general.So, if building self esteem and confidence is one of you concerns, there are several ways on how you can be able to do this without difficulty. These ways include the following:Try to become skilled at the things that the majority of people cannot do. It does not mean that you need t be a superhero with super powers to accomplish a certain undertaking that are usually avoided by people.

Study and develop a new skill. By this means, building self esteem and confidence is much easier to achieve. Think big and plan big. Big plans can really make someone feel very special since our mind tells us that these big plans could lead to bigger accomplishments and of course, success.Go out of your comfort zone. Building self esteem and confidence is often not achieved because we are afraid to rise above our comfort zone. In summary, do not be shy or scared of the unknown. Building your esteem and confidence is a personal journey which you must undertake. Go for it! I wish you every success.The number one thing that holds most people back from achieving success and happiness that we all deserve is having low self esteem. We can not go forward and achieve the simplest things because we do not believe in ourselves.

Forgive your mistakes and work towards being a better person. No one is perfect! Instead, learn from your mistakes.Be confident, never over confident. Believe in yourself and strive to better yourself every moment. Never put yourself down, for anything or anyone.Remember to have fun! Life is short, so make the most of it when you can. It is never wrong to have fun! Enjoy life and be happy!

This kind of problem can erode the foundations of your relationship until there is not much left. This might take years to happen and then the spouse will just blow up. Obviously this can have catastrophic results on the relationship.You cannot force any to have more self-esteem because it has to come from within themselves. Saying that, it is possible to encourage them to work on self-esteem issues, even though you should not expect overnight results.Here are some tips for building self-esteem in your loved one:Offer them unconditional love. Whatever they do or don't do, show your love for them. If their behavior is upsetting you, discuss this with them but do it together. Everyone makes mistakes. If they make a mistake, show that you still love them regardless.

Be supportive. Make sure your spouse knows they have your full support. If someone else is criticizing your partner, you need to defend him or her from this. The relationship between a husband and wife is supposed to supersede other relationships. You need to stand by your spouse fully and show total support.Be respectful to your spouse. Don't be a doormat but do show respect. Use words like please and thank you and avoid treating him or her like a child. Doing that or nagging is disrespectful and demeaning and will crush their self-esteem even more. Someone with low self-esteem often feels they don't deserve respect. Respect will make them feel better and can help to build their self-esteem.

Be appreciative so your partner is aware that you appreciate the things they do. Whether it is cleaning the bathroom or cooking a meal, let them know you appreciate the gesture. Tell them they make a great parent if you have kids. If you are being honest and loving, you will see many things your spouse does which you can praise them for.Make sure to share the credit. If your spouse is suffering from low self-esteem, they might not see how they are contributing to the marriage and family every day. Point out these things to others and to your spouse. Let your spouse know how much you value their abilities and how much it helps.Help your spouse to discover any hidden talents. Ask them about what they can do well or like to do or would even like to learn to do. Encourage them to do more of this or take a class. Perhaps you will both be interested and can learn or practice together.

While this behavior is completely understandable, it does nothing for your self esteem or your self worth. Although you may not feel like it, it's so important to take care of yourself and do what makes you happy. Now is the perfect time to do all of those things you've been putting off or to stop neglecting yourself, your own needs, and those things that make you happy. Take up old hobbies. See friends. Get that facial or highlights you've been wanting. Do whatever it takes to put a smile on your face. Not only will you feel better, but this will demonstrate to yourself and your husband that you are a vital, worthwhile woman who loves herself enough to get moving. As Hard As It May Be, Focus On Intimacy And Trust When You Are Ready: Always remember that you are the same person that your husband once feel deeply and head over heals in love with. Yes, the circumstances may have changed and there's no denying he made an unfortunate choice, but once upon a time when your husband had no reason to lie or fake it, you made his heart soar.

Understand that you are a very desirable woman no matter what has happened in recent days. Whether you still want your husband or you end up with someone else, one day you will have to restore trust and intimacy with a man again. The affair may make this difficult, but here is the catch 22. In order to feel truly intimate with a man, you must trust him. You can't do this if deep down you have doubts about his true feelings and loyalty. The best way to banish these doubts is to, when you are ready, dive in first with one toe and eventually with your whole open heart.Yes, this will make you feel vulnerable at first, but here's the truth. Your self esteem will be restored when you experience deep and lasting intimacy that can not be faked or manufactured. It helped me to educate myself on intimacy and sexuality. I learned several things that I wasn't doing in my marriage that ignited serious and very genuine sparks and fireworks when I did. I no longer worry that my husband will cheat again. He's very happy at home. It may be a while before you are ready for this, but be patient. You will know it when you feel it and when you do, I doubt very much you'll be thinking about your self esteem at that time.




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