Nobody's perfect. When it is common for families to have two working parents, single parent homes, co-parenting, mixed families, and just plain, standard mothers and fathers doing the best they can, mistakes occur. Mistake number one: parents or guardians too tired to parent.
This is probably our oldest parenting mistake. Back in "the day," parenting after a tedious day hunting and gathering probably looked more like an episode of "Survivor" rather than "The Waltons." Parents put older brothers or sisters in command of younger siblings; children who could prepare food were put to work, while Mom and Dad shielded the clan from rapacious animals and neighbors. In true Darwinian fashion, children who didn't fit with family norms probably didn't survive.
Today, well-intentioned, tired parents or guardians know they ought not to ignore misbehavior, yet frequently find that it is simply better to permit the television and Playstation to parent their kids. Tantrums are met with concessions. Kids learn how to act on their own volition instead of ask permission because they know results from exhausted parents can be bartered away through whining, manipulation, endurance, and even good behavior.
This leads us to mistake number two: parents that cannot apply suitable punishment because their child is exhibiting good behavior such as cleaning the car, vacuuming, and setting the table. Time off for good behavior only works in prison. In the home, kids are in command of their behavior choices, and parents and guardians are in control of the related punishments and rewards. If kids are allowed to select their behavior and manipulate the response of their parents by acting "good," this can lead on to power struggles, perplexity, and more manipulation. Children shortly learn that their tired parents and guardians crave love and contentment (and a clean vehicle), and will do anything to cut down a punishment if their children reward them with good behavior and good attitudes.
Parenting is not for the faint-hearted, and perfection in parenting is a myth! There are many time management books for moms and dads to show how to conserve energy for parenting in the midst of a hectic working schedule. Always keep an eye peeled for good parental advice and do your utmost to use a time management plan if you're overworked.
This is probably our oldest parenting mistake. Back in "the day," parenting after a tedious day hunting and gathering probably looked more like an episode of "Survivor" rather than "The Waltons." Parents put older brothers or sisters in command of younger siblings; children who could prepare food were put to work, while Mom and Dad shielded the clan from rapacious animals and neighbors. In true Darwinian fashion, children who didn't fit with family norms probably didn't survive.
Today, well-intentioned, tired parents or guardians know they ought not to ignore misbehavior, yet frequently find that it is simply better to permit the television and Playstation to parent their kids. Tantrums are met with concessions. Kids learn how to act on their own volition instead of ask permission because they know results from exhausted parents can be bartered away through whining, manipulation, endurance, and even good behavior.
This leads us to mistake number two: parents that cannot apply suitable punishment because their child is exhibiting good behavior such as cleaning the car, vacuuming, and setting the table. Time off for good behavior only works in prison. In the home, kids are in command of their behavior choices, and parents and guardians are in control of the related punishments and rewards. If kids are allowed to select their behavior and manipulate the response of their parents by acting "good," this can lead on to power struggles, perplexity, and more manipulation. Children shortly learn that their tired parents and guardians crave love and contentment (and a clean vehicle), and will do anything to cut down a punishment if their children reward them with good behavior and good attitudes.
Parenting is not for the faint-hearted, and perfection in parenting is a myth! There are many time management books for moms and dads to show how to conserve energy for parenting in the midst of a hectic working schedule. Always keep an eye peeled for good parental advice and do your utmost to use a time management plan if you're overworked.
About the Author:
Dr. Kate Walker is an approved professional specialist in the Woodlands, Texas. Her parental advice making sure understanding for tired parents looking for a time management plan, as well as tips for handling misbehavior to demonstrate how to effectively parent while working.
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