How to gain confidence? Let's begin with focusing on what you have. Too many people always focus and complain on what they do not have. We all have a lot going for us if only we sit back and count our blessings. Start by focusing on what you have and your journey to gain confidence will begin on the right footing. You wouldn't need a counseling degree to understand these tips to improve your confidence.Self Belief.You are what you think. If you think you know nothing then you really know nothing. But if you take time to believe in yourself, no matter how challenging this task is to you then you are on to something. Self belief is very important especially in learning how to gain confidence. Our thoughts affects our feelings and it affects our actions.
You only need one thing when you go up the stage: confidence-an unaltered confidence. It's what makes your legs stop from trembling. It keeps your feet intact on the ground. It clears your mind for you to be able to concentrate on just the content of what you have to say. The dilemma right here is this: how are you going to gain that confidence?There are two kinds of public speaking you might be caught in. One is that kind in which you are given a period of time to prepare, such as guest speaker speech during a commencement exercise. The other kind is the speech in which you are caught off guarded, such as extemporaneous speeches or ambushed interviews.
Let's take the first kind first. Since you are given enough time to prepare for it, then you might as well take advantage of that time. Never take it for granted and start writing your speech at the last minute instead. A rushed speech will betray you of your confidence. The tendency is that, if you go unprepared, your mind will be rattled. And when your mind is as messed up as garbage, the words that will come out from you will be nothing but gibberish. You're definitely going to lose your audience. So if you want to turn on the other side of the table and make things right, organize your speech and do it well. Preparedness can make you confident. The reason is simple: you know what you're going to talk about beforehand. It's like showing your audience a painting you have worked hard for. You simply know your craft.
Avoid Toxic People.It's very important to avoid people who are cynical about your attempts at anything. Get away from critics who are just out to bring you down regardless of how hard you did something. For some reason or another, they savor the opportunity to see people achieve less or achieve nothing at all. As if that will make them look better.Gain Support.Just as important to avoid toxic people is to gain support for whatever you are doing. Surround yourself with good encouraging friends. Good friends are like sunshine, soil, fertilizers and water to the confidence seed you are growing.Make A To Do List.Commit to a few things you will do. There is no use reading an article on how to gain confidence if you do not have a plan and commit to it. Commit to gaining confidence. Have a few things you feel doable in the short term and be sure to do them. You want to create a "things you have done well" list. It acts as a confidence builder. They need not be super-duper goals. Just goals you feel good about. Then increase the next goal to be a little more challenging. As you do, achieving goals will become a habit and hence build confidence.Another way that has worked for me is to read motivating materials. It is my way of feeding my mind with positive things and also to know that I am not alone in my quest. Sometimes, no matter how you try to avoid toxic people, no matter how discipline, committed you are, some things will beat you down. Reading or listening to motivating material is like fuel for your quest to gain confidence.
Help Someone.Helping someone makes you feel good. It also allows you to see some of the qualities you have that you may have overlooked. Being able to help someone is a subtle and often overlooked way on how to gain confidence. Think about it, being able to help someone says that you do have some good skills other needs.How to gain confidence? You need not do all of it. Feel free to mix and match. Try different things. The important part is act upon your plan.Have you ever felt the whole world was against you? No matter what you try, you just can't succeed, causing you to have a total lack of self-confidence. You may even feel that way now, but what I am about to share with you should pull you out of that place and into a mindset and feeling of total possibility and success to ensure you boost your self-confidence rapidly.While you feel isolated from everyone else when you are going through this phase with no confidence, within the next few minutes you will learn that you are not alone at all. In fact you will discover that you have more support at your disposal than you thought possible guaranteeing you to build confidence.
While some people revert to eating, shopping, crying, screaming or even, hibernating from everyone, I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that these reactions don't help the situation or your self-confidence very much. Instead of running that "spit the dummy" routine when you are feeling like a failure, let's transfer your focus and energy on something that may help your cause, instead of magnifying it.The quickest way to do this is turning to your supporters. Firstly you need to know,Who are your supporters? Who can help pull you out of this emotional downtime? Who can give you that confidence boost?I call this emotional downtime, because, while you feel like a loser with no confidence, it's only your emotions which are responsible for your results. Your actual knowledge and skills are good enough to succeed, but it's your pessimistic focus that drives your negative emotions which in turn give you the disappointing results that you produce when in this state resulting in no confidence. When you are in such an emotional downtime, it's virtually impossible to turn yourself around by yourself.
All you need to do is alter your thoughts and views which in turn will turn your emotions and results around 180 degrees. But it's very difficult to do by yourself.You have been to five job interviews and failed to get the job on all occasions. Of course now you have a lack of self confidence and are starting to think negatively about the next job interview. You may start saying things like, "I'm a loser", "I'll never get a job", "I'm not good enough" and so on.Now it will be almost impossible for you to walk into the next job interview with optimistic expectations and be upbeat. Instead you will be thinking "why bother".Reading this now, I'm sure you will agree that it is all so obvious. But take yourself back to some similar situations that you have been in and remember that you too reacted in such a no hope attitude, shutting off the possibility of a positive outcome. It's very hard to turn it around by yourself!
Get the facts right.The media coverage of the crisis is often greatly exaggerated and distorted. It is important that you limit your news intake as they may cause nervousness and enforce general negative attitude. Do not let yourself be pushed into fear and despair. You cannot, however, live in ignorance and oblivion to the facts. Research past financial downturns - they have all been overcome and the global economy emerged even stronger and better. Take a lesson from history and think positively about current situation. This recession will pass. Use your own judgment and instincts to gain hope and confidence in a positive turnaround of the events.
Choose who you spend time with wisely.Happiness is contagious, surround yourself with genuine and constructive people and some of their attitude will rub off on you and influence you in a positive way. You may want to spend more time with family; you need each other's support and faith. Give yourself small breaks and do something that makes you happy: meet with friends, take a walk in the park, go to cinema or treat yourself to a small gift.
So all you have to do once they accept to help is,Make sure you are willing to listen, learn and change your points of view. All you want to achieve out of this is a snap out of your negative thoughts to alter your feeling as a confidence builder. It doesn't matter so much if they are right or not with whatever they say, just be open and willing to accept a fresh point of view to make this transition successful. It won't help at all if you are in denial and every time they say something that goes against your beliefs, you snap back at them saying they are wrong. Right and wrong does not matter right now. Getting you out of your emotional downtime is the only issue. Praise them like mad, but be genuine. That way, they will feel good, knowing that you really respect their time and words of advice and will be very willing to help you again should you fall into the same emotional downtime again.Don't forget, you are NOT alone when you feel the world is against you and you have no confidence. Go to your "coaches" and use them to pull you out of the emotional downtime and move on confidently.
You only need one thing when you go up the stage: confidence-an unaltered confidence. It's what makes your legs stop from trembling. It keeps your feet intact on the ground. It clears your mind for you to be able to concentrate on just the content of what you have to say. The dilemma right here is this: how are you going to gain that confidence?There are two kinds of public speaking you might be caught in. One is that kind in which you are given a period of time to prepare, such as guest speaker speech during a commencement exercise. The other kind is the speech in which you are caught off guarded, such as extemporaneous speeches or ambushed interviews.
Let's take the first kind first. Since you are given enough time to prepare for it, then you might as well take advantage of that time. Never take it for granted and start writing your speech at the last minute instead. A rushed speech will betray you of your confidence. The tendency is that, if you go unprepared, your mind will be rattled. And when your mind is as messed up as garbage, the words that will come out from you will be nothing but gibberish. You're definitely going to lose your audience. So if you want to turn on the other side of the table and make things right, organize your speech and do it well. Preparedness can make you confident. The reason is simple: you know what you're going to talk about beforehand. It's like showing your audience a painting you have worked hard for. You simply know your craft.
Avoid Toxic People.It's very important to avoid people who are cynical about your attempts at anything. Get away from critics who are just out to bring you down regardless of how hard you did something. For some reason or another, they savor the opportunity to see people achieve less or achieve nothing at all. As if that will make them look better.Gain Support.Just as important to avoid toxic people is to gain support for whatever you are doing. Surround yourself with good encouraging friends. Good friends are like sunshine, soil, fertilizers and water to the confidence seed you are growing.Make A To Do List.Commit to a few things you will do. There is no use reading an article on how to gain confidence if you do not have a plan and commit to it. Commit to gaining confidence. Have a few things you feel doable in the short term and be sure to do them. You want to create a "things you have done well" list. It acts as a confidence builder. They need not be super-duper goals. Just goals you feel good about. Then increase the next goal to be a little more challenging. As you do, achieving goals will become a habit and hence build confidence.Another way that has worked for me is to read motivating materials. It is my way of feeding my mind with positive things and also to know that I am not alone in my quest. Sometimes, no matter how you try to avoid toxic people, no matter how discipline, committed you are, some things will beat you down. Reading or listening to motivating material is like fuel for your quest to gain confidence.
Help Someone.Helping someone makes you feel good. It also allows you to see some of the qualities you have that you may have overlooked. Being able to help someone is a subtle and often overlooked way on how to gain confidence. Think about it, being able to help someone says that you do have some good skills other needs.How to gain confidence? You need not do all of it. Feel free to mix and match. Try different things. The important part is act upon your plan.Have you ever felt the whole world was against you? No matter what you try, you just can't succeed, causing you to have a total lack of self-confidence. You may even feel that way now, but what I am about to share with you should pull you out of that place and into a mindset and feeling of total possibility and success to ensure you boost your self-confidence rapidly.While you feel isolated from everyone else when you are going through this phase with no confidence, within the next few minutes you will learn that you are not alone at all. In fact you will discover that you have more support at your disposal than you thought possible guaranteeing you to build confidence.
While some people revert to eating, shopping, crying, screaming or even, hibernating from everyone, I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that these reactions don't help the situation or your self-confidence very much. Instead of running that "spit the dummy" routine when you are feeling like a failure, let's transfer your focus and energy on something that may help your cause, instead of magnifying it.The quickest way to do this is turning to your supporters. Firstly you need to know,Who are your supporters? Who can help pull you out of this emotional downtime? Who can give you that confidence boost?I call this emotional downtime, because, while you feel like a loser with no confidence, it's only your emotions which are responsible for your results. Your actual knowledge and skills are good enough to succeed, but it's your pessimistic focus that drives your negative emotions which in turn give you the disappointing results that you produce when in this state resulting in no confidence. When you are in such an emotional downtime, it's virtually impossible to turn yourself around by yourself.
All you need to do is alter your thoughts and views which in turn will turn your emotions and results around 180 degrees. But it's very difficult to do by yourself.You have been to five job interviews and failed to get the job on all occasions. Of course now you have a lack of self confidence and are starting to think negatively about the next job interview. You may start saying things like, "I'm a loser", "I'll never get a job", "I'm not good enough" and so on.Now it will be almost impossible for you to walk into the next job interview with optimistic expectations and be upbeat. Instead you will be thinking "why bother".Reading this now, I'm sure you will agree that it is all so obvious. But take yourself back to some similar situations that you have been in and remember that you too reacted in such a no hope attitude, shutting off the possibility of a positive outcome. It's very hard to turn it around by yourself!
Get the facts right.The media coverage of the crisis is often greatly exaggerated and distorted. It is important that you limit your news intake as they may cause nervousness and enforce general negative attitude. Do not let yourself be pushed into fear and despair. You cannot, however, live in ignorance and oblivion to the facts. Research past financial downturns - they have all been overcome and the global economy emerged even stronger and better. Take a lesson from history and think positively about current situation. This recession will pass. Use your own judgment and instincts to gain hope and confidence in a positive turnaround of the events.
Choose who you spend time with wisely.Happiness is contagious, surround yourself with genuine and constructive people and some of their attitude will rub off on you and influence you in a positive way. You may want to spend more time with family; you need each other's support and faith. Give yourself small breaks and do something that makes you happy: meet with friends, take a walk in the park, go to cinema or treat yourself to a small gift.
So all you have to do once they accept to help is,Make sure you are willing to listen, learn and change your points of view. All you want to achieve out of this is a snap out of your negative thoughts to alter your feeling as a confidence builder. It doesn't matter so much if they are right or not with whatever they say, just be open and willing to accept a fresh point of view to make this transition successful. It won't help at all if you are in denial and every time they say something that goes against your beliefs, you snap back at them saying they are wrong. Right and wrong does not matter right now. Getting you out of your emotional downtime is the only issue. Praise them like mad, but be genuine. That way, they will feel good, knowing that you really respect their time and words of advice and will be very willing to help you again should you fall into the same emotional downtime again.Don't forget, you are NOT alone when you feel the world is against you and you have no confidence. Go to your "coaches" and use them to pull you out of the emotional downtime and move on confidently.
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